the novelist {rachel}

{via pinterest}

50030.

this was my final number on the 27th of November. somehow, by the power of God, i finished my NaNoWriMo novel.

well, i finished the word goal. the novel itself is still undone. i am anticipating a novel that may double in word count by the time the story completes.

and with a publisher already expressing interest in Cut Loose, i have my path laid out. December will still be busy, even though the writing month has come to an end.

but i've also come to another decision, one that crept to my lips at breakfast with my husband today. one that i had not voiced before.

i'm not going to wait until November 2012 to write another novel.

i'm starting again in January. no word counts or time crunches, no insane word sprints or nightmares of being pursued by passionate purple bars and line graphs.

i don't even know what i'm going to write about. but i've had ideas coming and going since the beginning of the month, ideas that i forced myself to push down and away while writing this current book.

NaNo may be over, but this blog is not even close to be concluded, and my writing adventures are continuing to grow.

so January will be a new start. not a resolution or a box to check off. it's a new thing, a freedom thing.

in Cut Loose, Niamh learned to cut her chains. 

in my life, NaNo helped me cut mine. 

my King and i, these words and i...we're looking forward.

geeking out {rachel}

{via pinterest}

i never write fangirl blog posts. not about handsome celebrities or the next great thing in music, with the one-time exclusion of Owl City.

but tonight, i feel the need to go just a bit crazy.

because Chris Baty just replied to me on Twitter. twice.

this checks off item no. 46 on my bucket list.

i am fully aware that i sound a bit like a frantic schoolgirl. i do wish you could have seen me, leaping around the house and dancing.

11:46pm, 11-15-2011. 

@ChrisBaty: "Seriously, right?"

{this tweet was in response to the technique of starting each day's writing on a fresh document to avoid spasmodically erasing the previous's days disasters.}

please forgive me this childish rant. but i must admit, this has given me quite the boost in my writing. 

33,163 words. 

i am overwhelmed and overjoyed. 

forgive this rant? i've consumed a great deal of caffeine and raspberry chocolate, and so i feel that it may have been inevitable. 

oh, my glorious God knew i needed this. desperately. 

excuse me for a moment...i'm going to go dance for my ultimate Hero.  

the Lover and Restorer of my weary soul.

day three {at the close -- rachel}

{via pinterest}

it's day three. almost the end of the day, actually.

and i'm at 11,048 words.

i'm not sure if i should break into cheers or copious sobs.

being this far ahead is incredibly frightening for me. my first year, i wrote 50,056 words. 20,000 of them were written in the last four days of November. last year, i barely scraped 30,000 in a month's time.

and now, i'm so far ahead in less than 72 hours.

and i'm elated. 

and petrified. 

in three days, Cut Loose has changed more than i ever imaged possible.

my lead character's name has changed from Caitlyn to Naimh.

what was once a magic-less story now has a complicated weaving of mages and a complete magical system revolving around the Elements and colour.

government has arisen and a monetary system has been invented. there are maps and geography where once there was blank paper.

it's a prism of light, an ever-changing thing.

at this point in  your novel, is it turning out the way you want it to? i suppose so. i'm honestly not sure; i didn't have a whole lot planned in the beginning, so i'm letting my characters run the show a bit for now. 

have your characters had any big turning points yet? definitely! Niamh's character has been tested three times now; her love has now been ripped away from her, and she is about to be married off to a man who is more deadly than she knows just yet. i'm scared for her, actually. she's strong, though, thank God.  

{via pinterest}

have any characters met their significant other in the book yet? oh, yes. they were together from the beginning of the book! 

what are your future goals for your novel this month (besides word goals)? i think it'd be very nice if my characters would start behaving themselves just a bit. i've let them run the show, yes, but even they need to reign it in just a bit. magic is dangerous, and Fire is the most dangerous element of all. 

current playlist: a combination of Howard Shore and Regina Spektor stations on Pandora, as well as a steady stream of Gilmore Girls on the DVD player. 

caffeine intake: high. extremely high. M&Ms and Dr. Pepper rank high on the list

latest night thus far: midnight, so far. but i'm pretty sure that a 2am bedtime will be down the road shortly. 

any emotional breakdowns: does crying count? and having to get up and leave the computer a lot to avoid editing? then yes. 

curious as to how the poet in me is handling this journey? then check out my two most recent personal blogposts here and here. 

-blessings abound,

rachel

plot-ish {rachel}

i finally feel like i have a footing. it's taken me six months to come up with this concept.

i'm honestly not sure what took me quite so long to let loose and allow my inspiration to create this concept in my head.

i will admit, a very large portion of this came to me in the bathtub {of all places} on Friday night. i now hold fast to cucumber melon body wash, and the power of a relaxing soak.

i am sharing this plot with you all. it comes direct from my NaNoWriMo profile, which is what i'm sharing with the world at large.

please understand. this plot is a seedling. the barest beginnings of what are yet to grow from my ever-growing inspiration.

take it in, if you will. drink it down like the copious amounts of coffee and Dr. Pepper that will accompany me in this process.

as a little girl, Caitlyn never wanted a fairytale life. in fairytales, all the fathers die and there's so much pain before the love. all she wanted was to grow up at her father's estate, marry the stableboy {Ashley}, and live in her own version of "happily ever after."

but her father dies anyway, fairytale or not. blamed for her father's death by her already bullying half-brother, she is still raised as a Duke's daughter, but treated with nothing but disdain.

when the time comes for her to marry, her brother cruelly ignores her pleas to marry Ashley as Caitlyn's father had always intended. instead, he chooses Royce, a sinister man who has a history for losing wives to mysterious deaths.

passed as a pawn from one frightening overlord to another, Caitlyn struggles to maintain her individuality while still preparing herself to become a murderer's bride.

she has faith still. she knows that love is stronger, faith is deeper. her father's words echo in her head: "you are this to some, you are that to others. but you are always mine, and you are always more."

will she find herself trapped forever, or will she find a way to be Cut Loose?

this is rough, i know.

be gentle with my soul. please?

-blessings abound,

rachel

pique

{via pinterest}

i'm touched by so many things.

wood, freshly hewed and polished alike. candles, their flames flickering in the darkness of night. lanterns with their soft beams casting a warm glow over me and my soul.

i surround myself with these things when the time comes for me to write. i know what piques my mind, what pushes my inspiration to its highest point.

i rent films. not movies filled with careless words and meaningless drivel. but films, rich with colour and life so gorgeous that it makes me melt.

An Education. 

Starlight. 

Edward Scissorhands. 

Once. 

Chocolat. 

Anne of Green Gables. 

The Chronicles of Narnia. Shakespeare in Love. 

i fill my ears with soundtracks to life and love. i find artists that don't just sing, but whisper their souls between the notes. i find those melodies that change and transform. 

Imogene Heap

John Williams

Hans Zimmer 

The Swell Season

Owl City

my senses come alive during this month. i slip between the words and find my place to snuggle up and watch this world pass.

what inspires your NaNoWriMo? what pushes you down this path? 

who are your guides?

-blessings abound,

rachel 

novelist {rachel's edition}

{via pinterest}

sum up your novel in five words or less.
music. eyes. ruins. luggage. freedom. 


{yes, i'm fully aware that my list could not be more disjointed. but there's a beauty in that, i think.}
 
Novel title?

current title: Cut Loose
be aware, this could change. it usually does. 


 Sum up your main character(s) in one word each.
Coleen: freedom
Allistar: passion


{names pending and subject to change. A LOT}

Advice for newbies in three words?
never give up.
 
Tell us about your secondary characters, how do they affect the story?
honestly, i'm not exactly sure yet. i'm already having problems with my secondary male lead running away with himself. i'm feeling the creeping fingers of frustration slipping over me already, and it's still nine days before we start. this may not be a good thing.

Do you plan to stay up till midnight on the 31st?
yes. i always do. i would be far too excited about starting to actually sleep anyway. so i stay up and write until i crash, wake up, and write more and more and more. 

{via pinterest}

How many years have you done NaNo?
three. 2009, i completed 50,216 words. 2010, i barely scraped 10,000. this year will be the best of them all.

What came first, characters, or plot idea?
characters. i have only the barest scraps of plot.

How much prep do you do before November?
quite a bit, actually. having my NaNo pinterest board as a springboard has truly helped me a great deal. it's been nice to be able to mentally coordinate and physically view my ideas as they come together. 

Now be honest, how do you really feel about NaNo?
in a word: terrified. i always get this way before NaNo though. it's a beautiful kind of fear, the kind that will spur me on to the completion of this novel. i'm more than a little excited, as well. i cannot wait to see what November brings me. 

-blessings abound,

rachel

to question and to answer

here we are.

twelve days from one of the biggest months in a writer's life. 

at this point, i'm honestly not sure if i'm ready to undertake this task yet again. it's my third year, sacrificing an entire thirty days toward the creation of a brand-new novel. breathing life into a new chapter, day after day after day. 

are you joining us? 

have you ever done this before? is this your first? your fifth? have you been writing since the beginning? 

for those of you who have never done this before

what questions do you have?

for those of you who have walked this path time and time again

what answers can you share?

this is a group effort. individual stories, but all one great work.

so please, share with us together. 

what are your questions?

what are your answers?

ask and we will answer.

share and you will be shared. 

twelve days and counting.

-blessings abound,

rachel 

down the aisle

for those of you who did not already know,

our beautiful Ali is now a wife. 

on october 16th {sunday}, ali and zach became man and wife. 

the wedding was beautiful. 

perfect. 

i can hardly begin to describe it to you all. 

it was the most romantic, simple, blissful wedding i have ever seen in my entire life. 

i was honoured beyond measure to have been a part of this day. 

a few notes from ali that she asked me to share with all of you:

• she and her new husband, Zach, will be on their honeymoon from sunday night until sometime next week. she will be back to posting -- both here and at her personal blog -- and commenting when she comes home. 

• she loves you all so very much, and so appreciates your support and words of love and encouragement leading up to this day.

• wedding pictures will slowly begin to trickle onto her blog, my blog, and this blog in the near future, so please keep your eyes open. 

ali has been so blessed by each and every one of you as she begins her life with her new husband. 

thank you from the depths of her heart...

...and from mine. 

blessings abound,

rachel

the maid of honour 

fascination

{via pinterest}

i've said it here already.

but i'm drawn to eyes.

and now as nanowrimo draws closer, i am getting more and more captivated by those little things that stare and pull and tug at my ink-blotched heart.

i find myself running my fingers over the worn wood of doors, searching for the stories in these portals. do you know? does anyone know what happened behind these entryways? loves lost, heart proclaimed, lives taken away.

and there there are the innocents. 

spoons and eggs and all those little things that are too much overlooked and not enough dwelt upon. their sacred appeal is lost in the shuffle.

and we start to write in twenty-seven days.

this countdown is getting shorter

but my list of fascinations are getting longer and longer.

i like that.

{via pinterest}

so i ask you.

what things captivate? fascinate? entrance?

share with me. 

-blessings abound,

rachel

{on an unrelated note: our beautiful Ali is getting married in two weeks. won't you join with me in wishing her and her handsome groom well? look for more wedding posts from us both in coming days, both here and at our respective locations}

first person shoes

i obsess over first person.

i've written three "books." two were first person. one was third.

the first person books are my compilations of OCD and too much thought. i struggle through them, tears drip down onto torn pages of frustration and overly furled browlines.

but i know why. it's because i don't want my voice in amid the fiction.

not even a note.

i don't know why i refuse to let my own voice slip into the mind of my characters. maybe because i'm too afraid of what might come out, what truths about me i might accidentally let into the open air.

i don't want to be the one to fill these empty shoes. 

but i'm steering away from this fear.  bit by fragile bit.

it's from reading a book. one thousand gifts by Ann Voskamp. she makes this thing of first person so simple. or maybe so hard yet made effortless by the voice of the King.

either way.

she pours herself out. 

yes, this volume is non-fiction and tells of truthful events and heartcries, not created characters. but yet the richness is still there.

she makes me think i can do this, truthfully. maybe with fiction, i can make it a little less fictional and a little more real. because this is real life after all.

naught but truth and honesty found here anymore.

so my fiction will be real. my real life will be through the filter of ancient days and past events that never truly came about.

but isn't that what we do here?

isn't that novelling, after all?

~blessings abound,

rachel

eyes

i have an obsession with my character's eyes.

actually, i'm obsessed with eyes in general. maybe it has something to do with the spiritual connotation found behind these rich pools of ocular beauty.

the eye is the lamp of the body

it's true, though. so much can be spoken through a simple glance. a moment spent gazed into another's eyes can be enough to pass along an entire conversation and more left unspoken. 

eyes are mirrors of the heart. 

and when it comes to my characters within those stories so close to my heart, i cannot be pulled away.

what hides behind them? what isn't being said? or what is being said so much louder than the tongue can convey? 

i have spent hours studying photos of eyes. reading their stories. 

eyes are books. pages of novels. 

i want to know. 

i want to see and read their hearts through these minuscule portals that i am allowed on this earth. 

maybe this makes me odd or strange or completely irrational. i would not be insulted if you said so, as the greatest of writers have been deemed strange. 

so strange is a good thing.

and i'm rambling. 

but that's okay. right? 

just let me see my characters' eyes. and i can try

and tell you their story. 

~blessings abound,

rachel 

ink dreams

via Pintrest

part of my novel came to me in my sleep last night.

rather, it was in that half-wakeful, half-dozing state that brings one to a place of reality and dreams unlike any other.

it was strange. i could hear the voice of my heroine. see the circumstances in her life...bits and pieces of them, anyway. i even heard portions of the prose itself narrated in my head in some unknown tone.

and then i awoke. 

and had forgotten most, if not all. 

i should have sat up and penned it all down. i now feel like something has been lost...like something is missing from within my soul.

this feeling of the forgotten

it is almost painful to my writer's heart. 

but in other respects, it is reassuring to me, as well.

i now know my characters live. my words breathe within me, and i can feel their life starting to surge in my blood.

i can still hear my heroine's voice in my ear, urging me forward.

i know i have something to give. something to write.

and in two months time, it will all begin.

and i will outline and plan and write down my scrappy thoughts

until the magic happens

soon. 

~blessings abound,

rachel

pinspired

found on Pintrest
a piece of my story

i have a pintrest addiction.

it's becoming more and more obvious with every passing day. there is just something so brilliantly inspiring about perusing page upon page of beautiful photographs

categorizing them

listing them.

it's the place that my artistic side and my OCD side get together for a playdate.

i have followed the example of several of my friends and begun the process of putting together a nanowrimo pinboard. 


it's starting to come together, i think. or maybe not.

see, i have a fairly cohesive concept for the story i'm going to compose. however, these pictures are starting to go in a slightly different direction than i originally envisioned. it's starting to challenge me a bit.

it's as if the story is saying

change with me

let me move

let me breathe.

found on Pintrest
a piece of my story

maybe i need to loosen my ideas a bit. maybe i need to let my story tell itself the way it wants to be told. maybe i need to become more pinspired, and less boxed in. 

i'm seeing colours. themes. locations and ideas. i'm seeing more and more of less and less. 

so i am going to pin away

and let my story breathe

and take me along

for the adventure of a lifetime.

~blessings abound,

rachel

holding it together

i am getting a combination of emotions regarding starting up this writing project again.

honestly, i haven't written anything other than my blog since last year's NaNo ended.

please understand

it is not for lack of trying.

i've started projects. 

 pages upon 

pages upon 

pages upon 

pages 

of ideas. and not one of them has spoken to me. 

this is madness. i've been writing since i was seven. why is this suddenly such a block? 

insert frustrated groan here.

maybe i'm trying too hard. maybe i need to just let go and write. 

excuse me, please. 

i need to seek the story again.

~blessings abound,

rachel